Dictionary For Dads

Find the right time to start:

Several dads recommended that if you are not having children do chores now, it is important to start when they are in a good mood. Schedule a family meeting on a weekend after a great breakfast or on an evening when the kids are home and can be relaxed. Trying to introduce the chore concept when they are already stressed is a recipe for failure.

Start with a master list:                                                                      Developing a list of all the jobs that are needed to keep your house functioning is a great beginning. Think about daily tasks like meal preparation, dishes, vacuuming, bedroom cleaning, pet care and so forth. Then list the weekly tasks like bathroom cleaning, weed pulling in the garden, mopping the kitchen floor, washing the family car and more. Getting a comprehensive list together may make the discussion overwhelming, but it is important to get the list right the first time.

Be prepared to negotiate:                                                                   It is important when you share the list in your family meeting to be ready to listen to the children's concerns. Some older children may have jobs or big homework loads. Some jobs may be too big for the smaller ones. One dad I know even suggested giving the list to the kids and having them work together to divide them up-at least the work assignments will be balanced.

Be clear about expectations:                                                             One creative dad I talked to prepared a "job card" for each chore and put them in a little binder made for index cards. The job card included the expectation ("room cleaned" means the bed is made, all clean clothing is put away, all dirty clothing is in a hamper, and the only things on the floor are furniture) as well as a list of needed supplies, where they are found, and to where they should be returned. This way, if the work doesn't meet your expectations, you can just point to the card.

Help them see progress:                                                                    For years, our family has used a variety of chore charts to help the kids remember their chores and do them. One of my favorites was one we used during the winter months. We made a snowman for each of the children and put one chore each on the snowballs, the stick arms, the carrot nose, the hat and scarf. Each morning, as they completed the appropriate chore, they put that part of the snowman on the chore chart (Velcro was a great invention!) When the snowman was all done, they would be so excited! Sometimes they would even race to see whose snowman was done first. Using chore charts to help them (and you) see their daily or weekly progress is a good motivation tool.

Have reward systems:                                                                                        I don't think you should bribe children to get chores done. But there should be some reward structure to help motivate them. After all, when they get older and get a job in the real world, they will at least have a paycheck for motivation. Each child will be motivated differently-find what works for them and then do it.

Set the example:                                                                                                  One of the best things a dad can do is to set the example of personal responsibility. If you have a regular assignment (clean out the garage, etc.) do it on time and within expectation. Other dads suggest that they try to never complain about their job, their supervisor or their coworkers, so the kids will know and see that they take their own responsibilities seriously. Being a good example goes a long way to making the chore world work well at home.

Remember it takes time:                                                                During my earliest years as a dad, I often thought about how much faster I could get something done myself rather than teaching my son or daughter to do it for me. And that is true in the early stages. But later in life, when the kids all know and perform their responsibilities, it gives the whole family more time later-not just more time to work but time to play and have fun together. It's a worthwhile investment of your time to teach personal responsibility through effective household chores.

Many toddlers want to help with chores, and while their “helping” may not always be appreciated, keeping their excitement and the habit of helping out alive, should be. Sticker charts are a great way to keep toddlers excited about helping. Their chores may have to be completed with you helping every step of the way, but you are laying the groundwork for children that find chores and helping a way of life. Bottom line is you encouraging them to help out is often more valuable than what they can do. Remember we want them to make an honest effort to help out and be a positive part of their environment.

• Assist in Making Beds
• Pick Up light Toys, Books & Games
• Assist Daddy with feeding Pets
• Help Clean Up spills and dropped Cereal

• Pick Up crayons, toys, games and books. This should be done before dinner, going outside to play or even before sleepPut clothes in the hamper whenever they take them off
• Show them how to make their bed in the morning
• Empty all waste baskets in the house
• Sweep the floor
• Wash and Dry all the plastic dishes
• Sort and fold laundry and put them away
• Help put away groceries
• Clear and wipe down the table after meals
• Dusting around the home
• Brushing  teeth three times a day should count as a chore  

These school age kids may or may not still have their childlike enthusiasm for completing chores. What they do have, however, is an overwhelming desire to be independent. Parents and caregivers can guide children to become independent in their chores, using chore charts to keep track of their responsibilities both completed and pending. Here are some examples of chores in addition to the ones above for this age group.

• Vacuum
• Sweep and Mop
• Vacuum
• Take Out Trash
• Assume more Pet Responsibilies

Children in this age are able of taking on additional responsibility especially where household chores are concerned. Develop a chore system that works for your family and be consistent with it. It is imperative that you provide support and input to the children assigned chores. Make sure that you provide rewards and verbal recognition to with your children.  Also provide negative consequences for not completing chores. Here are some examples of chores in addition to the ones above for this age group.

• Help Wash Car
• Light Painting while Supervised
• Learn to Wash Dishes
• Clean Bathroom
• Rake and Bag/Mulch Leaves
• Fold and Sort Laundry

Teenagers are developmentally ready to handle almost any chore in the home. At the same time a teenager’s schedule can sometimes become quite hectic, leaving little time for chores. Make sure that the workload of your teenagers is manageable. Here are some examples of chores in addition to the ones above for this age group.

• Clean outside grill
• Clean Bathrooms
• Perform all parts of the laundry
• Power Wash home,deck or boat
• Clean out  and wash refrigerator
• Prepare grocery lists Trim shrubs water garden